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samaritan institute mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs faith-based pastoral counseling hickory nc pastoral counseling charlotte nc mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs christian counseling faith-based counseling charlotte nc monroe hickory statesville shelby counselor methodist christian faith-based faith arey jonathan golden matson huntersville charlotte gastonia christian counseling faith based counseling samaritan center aapc dilworth broad street assurance counselor central hickory statesville united methodist spiritual golden pastoral faith-based christian counseling counselor united methodist samaritan institute mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs faith-based pastoral counseling hickory nc pastoral counseling charlotte nc christian counseling faith-based counseling charlotte nc monroe hickory statesville shelby counselor methodist christian faith-based faith arey jonathan golden matson huntersville charlotte gastonia christian counseling faith based counseling samaritan center aapc dilworth broad street assurance counselor central hickory statesville united methodist spiritual golden faith-based christian counseling counselor united methodist samaritan institute mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs faith-based pastoral counseling hickory nc pastoral counseling charlotte nc mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs christian counseling faith-based counseling charlotte nc monroe hickory statesville shelby counselor methodist christian faith-based faith arey jonathan golden matson huntersville charlotte gastonia christian counseling faith based counseling samaritan center aapc dilworth broad street assurance counselor central hickory statesville united methodist spiritual golden pastoral faith-based christian counseling counselor united methodist samaritan institute mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs faith-based pastoral counseling hickory nc pastoral counseling charlotte nc christian counseling faith-based counseling charlotte nc monroe hickory statesville shelby counselor methodist christian faith-based faith arey jonathan golden matson huntersville charlotte gastonia christian counseling faith based counseling samaritan center aapc dilworth broad street assurance counselor central hickory statesville united methodist spiritual golden faith-based christian counseling counselor united methodist samaritan institute mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs faith-based pastoral counseling hickory nc pastoral counseling charlotte nc mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs christian counseling faith-based counseling charlotte nc monroe hickory statesville shelby counselor methodist christian faith-based faith arey jonathan golden matson huntersville charlotte gastonia christian counseling faith based counseling samaritan center aapc dilworth broad street assurance counselor central hickory statesville united methodist spiritual golden pastoral faith-based christian counseling counselor united methodist samaritan institute mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs faith-based pastoral counseling hickory nc pastoral counseling charlotte nc christian counseling faith-based counseling charlotte nc monroe hickory statesville shelby counselor methodist christian faith-based faith arey jonathan golden matson huntersville charlotte gastonia christian counseling faith based counseling samaritan center aapc dilworth broad street assurance counselor central hickory statesville united methodist spiritual golden faith-based christian counseling counselor united methodist samaritan institute mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs faith-based pastoral counseling hickory nc pastoral counseling charlotte nc mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs christian counseling faith-based counseling charlotte nc monroe hickory statesville shelby counselor methodist christian faith-based faith arey jonathan golden matson huntersville charlotte gastonia christian counseling faith based counseling samaritan center aapc dilworth broad street assurance counselor central hickory statesville united methodist spiritual golden pastoral faith-based christian counseling counselor united methodist samaritan institute mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs faith-based pastoral counseling hickory nc pastoral counseling charlotte nc christian counseling faith-based counseling charlotte nc monroe hickory statesville shelby counselor methodist christian faith-based faith arey jonathan golden matson huntersville charlotte gastonia christian counseling faith based counseling samaritan center aapc dilworth broad street assurance counselor central hickory statesville united methodist spiritual golden faith-based christian counseling counselor united methodist samaritan institute mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs faith-based pastoral counseling hickory nc pastoral counseling charlotte nc mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs christian counseling faith-based counseling charlotte nc monroe hickory statesville shelby counselor methodist christian faith-based faith arey jonathan golden matson huntersville charlotte gastonia christian counseling faith based counseling samaritan center aapc dilworth broad street assurance counselor central hickory statesville united methodist spiritual golden pastoral faith-based christian counseling counselor united methodist samaritan institute mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs faith-based pastoral counseling hickory nc pastoral counseling charlotte nc christian counseling faith-based counseling charlotte nc monroe hickory statesville shelby counselor methodist christian faith-based faith arey jonathan golden matson huntersville charlotte gastonia christian counseling faith based counseling samaritan center aapc dilworth broad street assurance counselor central hickory statesville united methodist spiritual golden faith-based christian counseling counselor united methodist samaritan institute mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs faith-based pastoral counseling hickory nc pastoral counseling charlotte nc mccs mccs mccs mccs mccs

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At the Movies

This month’s video, from Google Tech Talks, is an excellent interactive lecture by developmental psychiatrist Dr. Daniel J. Siegel, clinical professor of psychiatry at the UCLA School of Medicine and Executive Director of the Mindsight Institute. In this lecture he talks about the mind and what constitutes a healthy mind.

You can learn more about Dr. Siegel here.

The video can be seen here.

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May 2013

Got Any Spare Change?

How do people change?

Part of the goal of counseling is to nurture positive change and growth in peoples' lives. Persons come to counseling with a host of difficult issues, things they're dealing with in their lives, such as depression, anxiety, grief, trauma, relationship conflicts, loss of meaning in life, eating disorders, stress, burnout, or some other psycho-spiritual dysfunction. They feel overwhelmed. They feel worn out. And they hope to change something that isn't working for them ... or at least to learn how to cope more effectively. They hope to come through the process new or renewed people.

But how do people change, really?

Most personality researchers would agree that the core of one’s personality—and especially trait personality—is pretty much set by the time a person reaches their early to mid 20's. Repeated studies have shown that, for the most part, trait personality doesn't really change very much after that. Crotchety old men were once angry young men; sweet older women were once kind younger women. Trait personality tends to become set in concrete at a certain age.

Studies have also found, however, that there are two things that can actually change personality for the better. One is the gradual process of extended counseling or therapy. The other is some kind of sudden religious experience or spiritual awakening.

William Miller and Janet C'de Baca, in their book Quantum Change, explore the second of these influences, the sudden changes that sometimes occur as a result of a religious or spiritual awakening. They describe quantum change as "a vivid, surprising, benevolent, and enduring personal transformation." This kind of transformation is VIVID in that it involves a sudden break with how things were before. One can usually point to a specific time and place where the transformation occurred. It's SURPRISING in that it’s totally unexpected; it shocks us into a new way of seeing the world around us. It's BENEVOLENT in that there seems to be an overwhelming sense of what Miller and C'de Baca call "lovingkindness" about it. And it's ENDURING in that life is never the same again. There's no going back. Nor would we want to go back if we could.

Examples? Think of George Bailey or Ebenezer Scrooge on Christmas Eve. Think of Paul on the Damascus Road. Think of Zacchaeus up that sycamore tree. Think of your own spiritual journey perhaps, and the sudden and surprising awakenings you’ve known, those life-transforming events. Something happens, some situation or unexpected event, some radical awareness or shattering realization suddenly breaks through the hard concrete shell of our personality ... and life is simply not the same afterwards. Our values radically change, our priorities shift dramatically, our appreciation of life deepens.

Persons who have experienced a sudden spiritual transformation—persons who have had a life-changing near-death experience perhaps, or persons who have had a sudden and unexpected life-transforming insight—all know something about quantum change. Sometimes we call it getting a wake-up call on life.

The thing about this kind of quantum change is that it’s not predictable. You can't orchestrate it or plan for it. You can't force it to happen, and you don't really see it coming. As a friend told me once, it’s like getting hit in the back of the head by a big wave at the beach because you were busy looking in the other direction. In a very real sense, it's grace. Gift.

Sudden quantum change isn't the only way peoples' lives are transformed; long-term counseling can do the same thing. But perhaps this kind of change is something that we don't appreciate enough.

Jonathan Golden, Ph.D.

Accredited service center of the American Association of Pastoral Counselors and the Samaritan Institute

MCCS Mission

We take a holistic approach to personal and family problems.

We are available to help with the emotional, relational, and spiritual dimensions of life’s challenges.

We are committed to providing a safe place, a listening ear, a caring presence, genuine respect, quality service, and positive regard.

We are dedicated to the healing of heart, mind, and soul.